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Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby digregorio1 on Wed Apr 22, 2009 5:45 pm

i have no social life, no confidence, no self esteem, constantly paranoid and self concious, im very quiet now, im half the person i use to be and all because of bells palsy. I suffer with synkinesis and its getting worse each year, i use to be a good looking confident person and now id rather die iv had enough. Iv not looked into treatment much cz i try and distance myself from bells palsy as much as possible and iv only saw my doctor once who wasn't any help, i've heard Botox is useful but nothing seems to cure it fully, dnt know what to do, but i can definately say my life has been ruined
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digregorio1
 
Posts: 1 | Joined: Wed Apr 22, 2009 5:28 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby ekramer on Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:46 pm

do not give up! i know that this thing changes everything in a profound way but you must focus on the positive things in life. you must surround yourself with positive people and situations. what we have is awful but others have much worse and they manage. It does put everything in perspective. I have a friend who is blind and losing his hearing. His children have medical issues as well. One has glaucoma and one is autistic. yet, every day he perseveres and overcomes his challenges and inspires many people. Find out who you are inside. I have been dealing with my bell's palsy for 10 years and it has slowly gotten better but it shows. I have a wonderful husband and friends and some days I even feel attractive again, until i see myself in the mirror. I know how that feels. but you know i am very lucky that I have such a support system and I know I am an important person to my family and friends. find yourself.
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Posts: 6 | Joined: Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:33 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby cmoss on Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:52 am

I agree it has changed my life. I had just been remarried 6 months when I got it. My job is front desk greeting people. Imagine having to watch people stare and wonder can they tell or am I being paranoid. Zoloft has helped me a ton. I've had BP 13 years, and like I said am considering surgery. What you need to tell yourself is exactly what kramer said it could be so much worse. It's not a death sentence. There are people with alot worse deformities. Belive me everyday I look in the mirror I pray please give back the beautiful smile I use to have. Every time somone says, let's get pictures, I just feel sicke. Never knowing how funny I will look. It's amazing from the statistics that as many people have it. I never notice anyone with it, so maybe we are being paranoid. Please don't let it stop you from having a great life, you only get one chance.
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cmoss
 
Posts: 4 | Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2009 11:11 am

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby Halfthebattle on Sun May 10, 2009 2:17 pm

I'am so sorry to hear that you're having problems with BP. I know it's pretty scary, and when you look at yourself in the mirror, you see a different person. I notice a few changes in my face, i can't smile like i used to. In the beginning my lip turned up like i was snearing, and talking was hard. Eating, and drinking was difficult, but things got better in time. I still have some tingling, and tightness when i'am stressed. For awhile i felt pretty down, but i think it was the Predisone that caused those feelings. Right now things are somewhat better. Stay with us. We'll be your lifeline.
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Halfthebattle
 
Posts: 7 | Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 1:36 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby emeraldmay on Sun May 10, 2009 5:09 pm

Please seek out some help. Talk to your Dr. I know this illness is terrible but it isn't worth killing yourself over. I've changed due to Bells also but I try to keep a good attitude. When it starts to drive me nuts and I start thinking of how bad I look or how (I think) people are staring at me, I think about the things that are good in my life. Please seek therapy. Bells is bad but not that bad.
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Posts: 20 | Joined: Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:45 am

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby islandgirl on Tue May 12, 2009 1:59 am

I agree with everyone's replies, it's a life-altering experience and might be one of the biggest challenges you face, but you can get through it!!! The one positive I've come away with is I've learned to appreciate alot of things and people I had taken for granted for a very long time. Keep posting, keep reaching out, we are all together in this.
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islandgirl
 
Posts: 6 | Joined: Sun Apr 12, 2009 10:58 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby blink on Thu Oct 08, 2009 9:34 pm

No, although I've been asked about that! How prejudiced people can be...whatever they don't want to deal with (or fantasize not being able to deal with!) they will try to project onto you. Everybody's personality (potential for handling problems) is different, so having a condition like BP does not make you an "automatic victim" of anything. What are your values? Do you accept others who are not 'perfect', and what does that mean? While I can understand the frustration (rrr!!) of ignorance about this condition, I believe I have just as much a right to exist as anyone else, enjoy my life, etc. regardless of how I look...I've had "little boyfriends" at an early age, and I was born this way--children definitely learn how to judge differences negatively, but my experiences were delightfully free of this nonsense. Must have helped my feelings about dating later on, because I expected good treatment, and got it (even some wonderful compliments about how I looked, because guys I dated didn't have an 'all or nothing' attitude to begin with. Learned how to avoid or talk back to the negative people (there are enough to try to bring you down to their petty level, but why hang out with such people in the first place? Assertiveness is key...you won't 'lose' anything but a lousy, one-sided relationship). Take courage--decent, wonderful people do exist; you just need to raise your standards and stop blaming yourself for their limiting attitudes..it's not you, it's them--they just don't want to admit it!!
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blink
 
Posts: 4 | Joined: Thu Oct 08, 2009 5:10 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby blink on Thu Oct 08, 2009 9:41 pm

No, although I've been asked about that! How prejudiced people can be...whatever they don't want to deal with (or fantasize not being able to deal with!) they will try to project onto you. Everybody's personality (potential for handling problems) is different, so having a condition like BP does not make you an "automatic victim" of anything. What are your values? Do you accept others who are not 'perfect', and what does that mean? While I can understand the frustration (rrr!!) of ignorance about this condition, I believe I have just as much a right to exist as anyone else, enjoy my life, etc. regardless of how I look...I've had "little boyfriends" at an early age, and I was born this way--children definitely learn how to judge differences negatively, but my experiences were delightfully free of this nonsense. Must have helped my feelings about dating later on, because I expected good treatment, and got it (even some wonderful compliments about how I looked, because guys I dated didn't have an 'all or nothing' attitude to begin with. Learned how to avoid or talk back to the negative people (there are enough to try to bring you down to their petty level, but why hang out with such people in the first place? Assertiveness is key...you won't 'lose' anything but a lousy, one-sided relationship). Take courage--decent, wonderful people do exist; you just need to raise your standards and stop blaming yourself for their limiting attitudes..it's not you, it's them--they just don't want to admit it!!
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blink
 
Posts: 4 | Joined: Thu Oct 08, 2009 5:10 pm

Re: Ever considered suicide

Post a new topicby 4everchef on Fri Dec 18, 2009 10:27 am

I know how you feel. That's how I woke up this morning, thinking this sucks so hard. I am at 11 months with BP and now have developed severe synkinesis. My Dr. really dropped the ball, said, "don't worry about it, you'll be better in two weeks". She never treated me, prescribed me antivirals, nothing. I want to kill her(not literally) I'm just so effing mad, angry, frustrated, disgusted. I had a BEAUTIFUL face, with dimples, really pretty eyes, my best features, they're gone now, never to return. I'm sick of people with normal faces telling me, "Oh, it doesn't look that bad". I'd rather have someone just say, "WOW, your face is effed up". At least I could say, "yeah, you're right" End of discussion. We live in a very phony world, where most people are concerned with the outside appearance. I used to cook on TV for a living, and now, I will never do that again, that part of my career is over.
This is a cruel disease. I don't have taste buds either. Thanks Bells Palsy. You suck.
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4everchef
 
Posts: 1 | Joined: Fri Dec 18, 2009 10:13 am

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